Me: Good morning, Mom.
Redneck Mom: Good morning, sweetie. Watch out for the mouse blood.
Me: ???
(I'd like to say that I'm not surprised by much anymore, but my Redneck Mom still delivers surprise after surprise.)
Me: Um, mouse blood?
Redneck Mom: *Giggling* Well, it was dark in here this morning and I saw something scurrying towards me. I couldn't tell what it was but I knew it shouldn't be running towards me, so I instinctively stomped on it! (Shows me how she stomped and then stands on one leg with hands flailing in the air.) Then I realized...eww, I stomped on a mouse! I stomped on a mouse!
Me: Mom!
Redneck Mom: *More giggling* I guess the cats brought a mouse in the house.
Me: Er, OK. But why did you leave dried up mouse blood on the floor? And... is that the mouse?? *pointing*
Redneck Mom: Oh, the cats will take care of it.
About Me
- City Slicker
- I was raised on a farm in a rural country setting and at my first opportunity, moved away to go to college. It was then that family members started to look at me with suspicion. Not because I was going to school but because I lived in a town where it was "so noisy," aka a fire department and neighbors. The last straw was when I moved to California and became a "Califoriegner." Though I have moved back in state within driving distance of my extended family, I will always be a City Slicker in their eyes. That's not necessarily a bad thing either, since I now appreciate the value of running hot water, know why it's important to keep the goats and chickens outside and will never have to eat a pet calf Grandpa accidently shot again. After much begging from my closest friend, I've decided to share some of my stories with you.
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